| About MeBrightness Inspired

Search

***

About Me

“Maybe you are searching among branches,
for what only appears in the Roots.”
-Rumi

I cannot remember a time in my past when I was not a spiritual seeker. As a young girl, I read stories about people who were not only good people, but had found meaning in their lives. This struck me as the something that was missing from my life and I wanted to find it.

“Without knowing what I am and why I am here, life is impossible.”
– Leo Tolstoy

What gave me the strength and determination to continue to try? Well, tenacity, and being an eternal student always helps. One experience was the straw that broke the camel’s back. After that, I just couldn’t ignore my experiences anymore.

“I am one of the people who love the why of things.”
–Catherine the Great

Many years ago, I became very ill. On one particularly bad day, after a month’s worth of bad days, I wondered if anyone would remember me if I stayed on this couch forever. I wondered what would happen to me and my job, and my marriage. I wondered about all these things that made up my life and if I would ever be able to experience them again. Then I wondered about myself and how much of what is “my life” is “me”. It occurred to me that “I” am not what I do with my life. I experienced such an expansive aspect of myself that I simply couldn’t deny or describe what this was all about and I knew I couldn’t stop until I understood. This was the depth I was searching for but couldn’t have found until I lost everything else.

“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.”
-Lao Tzu

I had always wanted to explore Buddhism. Something inside said I might find the meaning I had been seeking. I was not wrong. I found Zen Buddhism and while some times I was completely confused during meditation, I couldn’t ignore the peace I found during other times. I learned that what I had been feeling was a desire to wake up. And once I found this stability in my life, I wanted to explore all the ways in which humans can reach it. I read everything and talk to everyone I came into contact with at Zen retreats. Asking questions was my practice. But my life has not been one where I got plenty of time to step out of my life and go live in a hut on a mountain and find myself. My way was the messy way- I had to find myself while in the midst of life, devoting time and attention to unearthing what’s real while in the middle of the illusion.

“All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make, the better”
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

After exploring many paths, I can no more believe the thoughts that I think in my head than I can believe Atlas carries the world on his shoulders. Both were created for the same purpose; to try and explain our reality in the form of myth and symbols in order to give a sense of control to our lives. And, the biggest thing, the thing that I never actually believed would happen, is that I’ve stopped feeling the need to seek. My search has ended. I made it back home and now I want to assure you that you will too.

“He is able who thinks he is able.”
-Buddha

Why inspiration? Well, to me, inspiration is that creative spark, the urge to unleash what tumbles inside of you. It is energy and motivation. I think it’s the perfect container for so much else that our lives need- passion, joy, curiosity. It also can hold the truths from the place of deep sorrow.

“There comes a morning in life when you wake up a new person; that is to say, you wake up the same person but you realize it’s your own fault.”
-Robert Brault

I want to share practical ways in which you can start on your own path. I’ll share what worked for me and others. It’s up to you to start your journey. I talk about self soothing and grounding techniques which allowed me to heal and lessen the stories in my head. Acceptance and self compassion allowed me to create room for others in my life. And it is through relationships that I’ve learned how to take what I hold within and bring it out into the world. All of this has been due to my choice in continuing to strive to become fully human while expressing the divine. I hope you’re inspired to do the same as I share these real life teachings on this site.

“Life is a pure flame, and we live by an invisible sun within us.”
-Thomas Browne

I don’t claim to have all the answers you seek- I claim that you do. And I humbly hope to be a lighthouse on your path, providing practical advice, techniques to center and deepen you, and gentle guidance to access your wisdom within.